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The ABCs Of Mediation

Before they begin the process, over 90 percent of participants believe that mediation will be a waste of time. They reason that if discussion and concession could have resolved their issues, they would not have gone to court in the first place. Yet, over 70 percent of participants settle most or all of their divorce issues in only a few hours.

That being said, mediation is not always a good idea. In many cases, one or both parties need the emotional closure that a court verdict often brings, there are real or perceived trust issues between the parties, or there are other valid personal reasons. But, in most cases, mediation is always worth a try, because of the tangible and intangible benefits that it often offers.


A sizeable minority of people do not recognize the government’s authority in certain areas, especially with regard to their own families. Specifically, there are hundreds of websites dedicated to the proposition that family courts are inherently flawed, due to an actual or alleged bias of one kind or another.

Other individuals have difficulty accepting authority from anyone, particularly if that person is of the opposite gender. Many men believe that a woman has no right to issue order in this area, while many women believe that a man is inherently unqualified to render judgments regarding children. Whether these opinions are right or wrong is irrelevant to this discussion: the point is that they exist.

There is evidence that meditation increases voluntary compliance, because the parties feel as though they themselves determine the outcome. This voluntary compliance can mean fewer trips to the courthouse for modification and enforcement proceedings.

Beau Monde

This French expression (“beautiful world”) conveys the concept of good manners and working together. Admittedly, it is also one of the only civility synonyms that begin with “b.”

When minor children are involved, the future ex-spouses will have to work together, at least to some extent, for a number of years. An emotional courtroom confrontation can engender hurt feelings that poison that co-parenting relationship. But, a mediated settlement demonstrates to the parents that, given diligent effort and perhaps guidance from a third party, they can resolve their problems without court intervention.


It is almost impossible to affix an average financial price for divorce, because these cases are so diverse. About the only certainty is that the procedure nearly always costs more money than the parties had originally estimated.

Mediation saves time, which saves money. Instead of preparing for a two or three-day trial, an attorney needs only to prepare an opening statement. The rest of the time, a mediator will convey offers and counter-offers between the parties. In a similar vein, there is no need to pay outside experts hundreds or thousands of dollars in appearance fees, because, in most cases, a simple report will suffice.

Contact Experienced Family Law Attorneys

Mediation may enable a sustainable solution for even the most complex divorce and child custody cases. For a confidential consultation with Charlotte attorneys who seek cost-effective solutions, contact Remington & Dixon, PLLC. We routinely handle cases in Mecklenburg County and Cabarrus County.

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